Why Is My Child Refusing to Go to School?

It can be distressing when your child refuses to go to school.

You might notice:

  • complaints of headaches or tummy aches
  • distress in the mornings
  • anger, tears, or complete shutdown

This is often described as “school refusal” or “school avoidance“.

 

It’s Not Just “Refusal”

For many children, this isn’t about defiance.

They’re not being naughty. The feelings are very real.

It may be that your child:

  • feels overwhelmed in the classroom
  • struggles to cope in busy environments
  • doesn’t feel safe or settled at school

 

Looking Beneath the Surface

When we look beyond the behaviour, we often find signs of stress or anxiety.

Your child’s nervous system may be feeling threatened, making it difficult to:

  • focus
  • process information
  • manage emotions

 

What Can Help

Understanding the “why” behind the behaviour is the first step.

Often, children who refuse school are struggling to process sensory information.

Their behaviour is the clue. 

Once we understand this, we can begin to support them, finding ways of helping them to feel safe.

Your child will appreciate your empathy and understanding – going to school can feel really tough.

 

A Gentle Next Step

I understand what it is like to have a child who is not enjoying school.

f your child is struggling, you probably are, too. 

It’s OK to reach out and ask for help.

You don’t need to face these struggles alone.

 

These Might Help

👉  Understanding What Your Child May be Feeling

👉 Learning is More than Just Reading and Writing

👉 When School Feels Unsafe: Understanding Your Child’s Nervous System

If you would like help with understanding with your child’s struggles, you are welcome to reach out.

👉 Work with Me

All articles are based on personal in-clinic experience, and are supported by current research into brain science. They have been written for general education purposes and do not constitute personal advice. If you are a parent, I encourage you to seek professional support.

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About Rosalind

Rosalind is a PACFA Registered Clinical Counsellor, with over 20 years experience in working with children with challenging behaviours and learning differences. She brings an holistic, or whole person approach to supporting parents, helping them raise children able to realise their potential. to live happy and successful lives. Appointments are available in person at Moruya on the NSW south coast and online Australia-wide.

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